Saturday, July 30, 2011

four bracelets and their story

I like bracelet. I love them. They're linger in your hand, and just stay there quiet. They are not like earrings n necklace. You can see them without using any mirror-kinda stuff. And the best part, sometimes they gave you unique feelings when you notice them on your hand.

I have four bracelets, and each one of them have their own story. I always wear all of it on my left hand when I'm going out. I have one that I wear all the time. And for some specific activity like certain sports, I put only one bracelet.

Actually I got another two or three, but I rarely put them on, so probably next time I'll write about them.



1. The white silver-looking-bracelet (I dont know what metal it is)
2. The black rubber-like-bracelet

Both those bracelets I bought at the same time at the same shop in Bandung, Indonesia, years ago, along with other two bracelets that I rarely put on.

I got very serious problem with my entire family and I really hate them at that time. Like some problems, I dont remember exactly what, how, and why did this problem happened at the first place. I roughly remember it was about some dispute over something, that I cant even remember what it is. But I remember it clearly that I really hate all of them because of this matter.

So long story short, me and my family are in good terms now. Probably because time heals (and hurts) everything. Don't get me wrong, I still don't like them, but we probably decide to forget all this without saying. I know sooner or later they are going to bring this problem on again, but they should know that I wont change my mind for whatever it is they expecting me to.

So, this story attached to these two bracelet (plus the other two bracelet that I bought n rarely put on). I had some mixed felling when I give this bracelet a thought. It's ugly, bitter, fun, relax, calm and empty altogether.

The black-rubber-like bracelet is actually a necklace, and I don't wear necklace.

And one interesting fact, they often made clanking metal sounds. Fun.

3. Brown leather bracelet

Years ago my best friend gave it to me. As simple as that, this bracelet often reminds me about how friend "is". They're fun, annoying, boring, helpful, trustful, grateful, crazy and sane because they are my friends.

This bracelet just broke last night. Sad.

4. Stripes of white, maroon, and cyan bracelet

My ex made this for me. From the first time she put it on my left hand, I almost never took it off. We broke up on January 2011. It was more than a year. Previously I never been in a serious relationship and last this long.

After we broke up, I was still wearing this bracelet until it's broken few weeks ago, late June 2011 if I'm not mistaken.

It's a bit sad, coz this bracelet combined with the brown leather looks good on my left hand. I think it's because they both have tailing threads. Cool.

.peter








Saturday, June 25, 2011

The question

Just Do it! .. Fuck! I know that. Stop telling me that. I need to answer this question first and even when I'm done with it, I might not do it.. Fuckin coward, I'm fucking coward.. it's fuckin difficult, too many thoughts, I should just do it.. damn!!


So, should I start something that I believe would hurt me badly when it is ended?


lack of luck, lack of luck.. I need luck, I need to create luck for myself!! Damn, I hate doing this!!!








Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Fact: I'm a coward

Yesterday, or the day before yesterday many of my fellow band mates performing on Jakarta Fair Cosplay & J-Music Fanatic held on Sunday, June 19th, 2011 at PRJ Jakarta.

samurai blue 1

There some videos, many many many pic (like above) taken from the show, and I spend like hours to check them all. Yeap probably ALL OF 'EM...

samurai blue 2

I dont know why, seeing all that makes me feels kinda sad.. Maybe because I can feel all the joy and fun they had, and I envy all that,.. or maybe I just being mellow and missed all my good old day performing with my previous bands..

They have invited me months before this event, but I cant make it, there re lot of things and I simply couldnt make it to go to Jakarta to attend this show..

This feeling makes me even more sad, I hate my life even more now,... I kinda regret all those decisions I made that leads my life along this path.. I felt like I should be there and doing the show along with my friends..

I feel like I don't want to be in this "fine" life where I work in Singapore, with decent job and decent everything.. I know this is a stewpidd thing, and many people can only wish they be what I am now.. but this is me, fuck others, I dont care.. I want what I want, and I wanted it now, but it's impossible to have. Fuckin sad, isnt it?

I think I really want to go back to small slice of my life where I felt the joy and the glorious in doing music, recording, performing, or jamming or just small gig..

But maybe I'm a coward, I have no courage to jump into devils playground and try my luck.. I'm too afraid of not having decent income, decent meal and "fine life"..

hmm.. no I AM A COWARD, that's why I'm here, right?.. in this uber pathetic sad life...

---

Anyway,.. I have a musical activity here in Singapore, every 2 weeks or so me and some friends from my country do a jamming session, quite fun.. that's also why I get new bass, Ibanez SDGR 505, and learn some Hard Rock songs..

I made one video of me covering one of the song, its title is The Spirit Carries On written and arranged by Dream Theater..



But knowing all that and making that vid doesnt make me feel any better..
so I'm wondering what choice do I have here?
What should I do to make me feel better?

sad..

.sic.zoc.peter

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Should I buy new bass guitar?

I met some new friends and we jam few old songs today... it's DAMN FUN!!

Though I came not prepared I was quite lucky, coz I managed to play at least 60% good..

I think I'm going back to music, but somehow I dont want to.. hmm.. I give it a lot of thought and I still couldnt decide ...

dont ask me why..

so, should I buy new bass guitar??

.sic

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Why TV Sucks!

Why?

lolz I dont know anymore.. but maybe not the TV, but the TV Show.. but I believe you all get what the idea when I say "TV Sucks", right?!

I forgot when was the last time I really interested in TV show. That's ironic, coz at very young age, I really really like to watch tv. Maybe because there were lots of great cartoon, anime and great movies on tv back at that time. But nowadays I think the most interesting thing in tv are advertisements. They are somehow entertaining and creative.

Indeed, most of my watching tv time was spent for watching ads, and skipping from channel to channel randomly watch some ads.

The second interesting thing is NEWS. But somehow news no longer interested. I got this strange feeling as if the news is somehow repeated or not really NEW anymore.. maybe because newspaper is free here..

Other things that sometime is interesting are those kinda nat geo documentary episodes, though I never turn on the tv to watch them on purpose.. just once in a while when I was crossing the living room and got caught by it, or when it got something exciting that makes my flat mate scream or doing things-that-people-do-when-they-got-exciting-by-tv-show..

But just that, the other things there are totally crap.. cheap candid drama, stupid reality show, and other trash that are not worth any second of my time..

So nothing really interest me there, so I gave up and hate TV. Yes, I hate tv. If I must force myself to watch TV I can watch ads,... but just watching ads on tv while hoping there's a good show come up is really really stupid in my opinion.. TV sucks man!

But if I'm going deeper with that, I think all that also happened because of the existence of Internet. I could always find almost all things on TV from Internet, and even better than how it were on TV. Some youtube channels are really good in my opinion. For news, I think internet delivers it "completely", where you can google or wikiped-ing details that interest you,.. then as another added values, internet also offers you to tell your opinion, comment, spam there,.. that either makes you a good benefactor, a wise smarty ass, or a cruel anonymous netizen..

And the greatest thing on internet is that you, yourself, can find out, control and interact with endless choices of information, show, news, and all things internet has out here, compared to small amount of channel/program that a tv cable provider offers you by paying not cheap submission...

Yes, I know that TV Show and Internet are different animals,.. But to be specific, let's take focus Youtube for comparison,.. For me, Youtube is somehow replace the TV. Maybe that because I'm a music-junkie-epic-failed-anti-social-nerd whose profile preference match most of youtube channels..

And you know what, I can host a show on youtube where thousand of people can watch my show, which again I'm not sure I could do with TV.

Indeed, I got thousand views on my channel, lolz...


Speaking of youtube, let me share here few youtube channels that I subscribe:
1. sxephil, The Phillip De Franco Show, my kinda news channel http://www.youtube.com/user/sxephil
2. filmriot, Movie making and movie related thing, http://www.youtube.com/user/filmriot
3. HuskyStarcraft, e-Sport channel (STARCRAFT!), http://www.youtube.com/user/HuskyStarcraft
4. DeStorm, great talented rapper, http://www.youtube.com/user/DeStorm
5. KurtHugoSchneider, talented mucisian n movie director, http://www.youtube.com/user/KurtHugoSchneider
6. DaveDays, youtube punk artist, http://www.youtube.com/user/davedays
7. NicePeter, very funny battle rap comedy, http://www.youtube.com/user/nicepeter
8. DavidsFitness, just to stay fit!, http://www.youtube.com/user/DavidsFitness
9. MarkCrilley, drawing tutor, http://www.youtube.com/user/markcrilley

So, where could you get something like this on TV ?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=80nZ5b_DKms

or something like this ?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mcp8lPiBP2Y


So, Do you really need 43 inch flat screen LED TV?
DAMN YES!!... for PS3 or XBOX or Wii or DVD/Blu-ray

.rpz

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Black Swan, Natalie Portman and Taylor Swift

Like I always said, I always try to be open minded. So I have no big deal about Britney being Britney and Lindsay being Lindsay.. I love them both when they were bright and once nice girl, but I dont know why I just dont have that much of love for them now.

I even forgot about Britney most of the times, but who remembers her now? I rarely hear her. I think she pays a big price by becoming wild and crazy. Different story with Lindsay, I heard things about her once in a times. Sadly most of them, like 90%, were about "something" Lindsay recently did, maybe cool things but in a bad way. A bit crazy and wild is okay I think, but the most important is how they hold their ground and keep producing "healthy" breakthrough rather than something crazy and stupid in a "way" people hardly seen any sense whatsoever. I wish she still can manage to came out with great work that would make her more to eccentric and less insane.


So what about Natalie Portman and Taylor Swift? Simply put, they both my new favorite now.

Well I've been in love with Portman since.. hmm, I forgot when, lolz. But I think Star Wars makes everything lovely just about Queen Amidala. That's why I love Kiera, Portman and Rose Byrne.

According to what I read, Portman is a smart girl, and very talented actress. Black Swan and Oscar confirmed it just now. So how about if Portman went wild, crazy and do what Lindsay does? Well, as long as she keep amaze me with her talent, I will always love her. Fair enough, isnt it?! And though she does, maybe I'll see all that as something cool and artistic in a way normal people not be able to reach and understand. Just like Johny Depp.

Okay, and Taylor Swift?

Well she's my new favorite. To be honest it's because she is my kinda type in a sense of beauty. Yes, I mean she is beautiful. But more than that, she definitely got talent. That's for sure. And after reading a lot about her achievement (yes I just know she exist last December), I am more than sure to promote her to my new favorite now.

I have high hope for her to always keep up the good work. And like Portman, it's okay for her to go wild and crazy.

Britney and Lindsay sure broke my heart, I hope Taylor Swift wouldn't do that. Because finding a favorite is very damn hard nowadays.


List of my favorites for now:
1. Taylor Swift
2. Natalie Portman
3. Rose Byrne


And for Black Swan, only one word: PERFECT!!
I haven't felt like this in a long time. There's rarely any movies made me feel like this. Not even Inception.

.rpz

Monday, February 14, 2011

Valentine's 11

Valentine's 11

by ~sic

hard to remember why do I believed
hard to recall when do we started

yesterday and Wednesday I was in doubt
yesteryear I was completely ignorant

not because Sunday was sunless
but because sunny day is cloudless

as laughing Monday gets silent,
and love died in a butterflies

like all Tuesday morning start at nights
let me alone in this moonless night

I don't care what is right or wrong
coz none of that matters for long

so let's just leap over, live and let die
coz life has offer for another vibe

don't be sorry you wont be seeing me dead
coz I wont be there after life ends

don't be sorry you wont be seeing me pray
coz I wont be there for another try

I'm sorry for you
I'm happy for me
hence I leave

it's been too long and too late
so don't be sorry

just remember that I tried very hard to reason with you


(c) 2011 All rights reserved.
(CC) Some rights reserved. This work is licensed